To Date or Not to Date


I have known my wife since she was eight years old. I was not that interested then because she was four years younger. When I was a senior in high school, she was in Jr. high. We attended the Jr-Sr High School in Boulder City, Nevada so we were acquainted that way. We also had seminary together. Her father was my bishop and teacher in school. I had liked him a lot as my Scoutmaster until I got into high school and he was my bishop. Our relationship went south while I was in high school. If it hadn’t been for her mother and her grandparents, we most likely would not have been able to date. Her father never told her that she couldn’t date me, but he did tell me once that we would not be a good match.
Just Married Joy and Jim Stubbs
Just prior to going on a mission my good friend Rulon and I spoke at a fireside. At the fireside were a number of young women who were just fifteen and not old enough to date. They would be old enough to date when I returned in two years.
I did date most of them until I took Joy out; we then became an item. I chased some of the other guys off. I had decided to marry her. I must admit that I had taken for granted that she would be just fine with my choices.
While serving in the East Central States Mission, her grandparents were a senior couple, and they really liked me. They were happy that when I got home, I was dating their granddaughter. When I got home from my mission I was wanting to get married. I had a girlfriend when I left for my mission, but while I was gone, I had changed and she had not. It just faded out after one date.
I looked around and was deciding who to marry. I thought that Joy would make a good companion. We dated for several months before I kissed her. It was after a movie. We had held hands all the way to her home and I kissed her. We were standing on her front porch. Later I put a brick by her front door so she would be just the right height. She liked the kiss and I have been told that she wanted more. I really liked it, and I ran the rest of the way home. It was only a block. My father told me that if I was going to date Joy, I had better be serious. My mother expressed the same feelings. They both knew Joy and her family and didn’t want me to string her along.
Joy and Jim Still Kissing
I had asked her to marry me during her senior year, but she said no, that she wasn’t ready to get married. I kept dating her, and she kept telling me no. Finally, I said that I was only going to ask her one more time, and if she said no then I would look to greener pastures. We dated for several more months and then at the end of one date she said, “Are you ever going to ask me to marry you again?” I took that to mean that she was ready to commit. It wasn’t really the case; she just wanted a little information. Well, I asked her again, and after a long silence, she said, “I guess so.” That was good enough for me, and so we were engaged.
I got a nice engagement ring from her grandfather’s store. She didn’t want a ring I had used for an engagement before I left for my mission. I understand now, but I was sort of clueless at the time. We went to the doctor’s office in St. George and had a physical. We got our marriage license, and then a few weeks later, we went back to St. George and were married for all time and eternity in the temple there.
I thought then and still do that I was the most blessed guy in the world. We have been married now for almost fifty-three years. That will happen on the twenty-third of June, at least I think that is the date. I keep messing up on anniversaries. Joy may care, but she still loves me.  
   

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