Mr. Business

I used to read the Reader’s Digest and there were some different areas that had humor or jokes. Throughout my teaching career there have been some very humorous events that have happened, at least they were to me. They could be called “humor in the halls” or maybe “who in the hall cares.” Two of them happened during school lock downs, one for an actual explosion that went off in the girls’ bathroom and another for a search by the city and state police of the school lockers.

The first time was when someone decided it would be a good idea to tape a firework of some kind to the wall in the girls’ bathroom. I don’t know how big it was, but it blew a hole in the wall and scattered broken ceramic from the walls all over the bathroom. Most of the teachers were not aware what was going on, they knew only to clear the building. While doing that I was clearing the hall and student lounge next to my room. A number of football players had decided not to exit the school and were in there together in the lounge. After getting most of them to finally move out of the school, there was one who refused to leave. I asked him his name and he said “none of your f----- business.

Orem High administration about 1994. Sitting Tina Howard,
 Tim Brantley, standing left to right: Richard Belliston,
 John Child, and Carl Stubbs, John Child was the Principal,
 the other four are assistant principals. 

About that time an administrator came along and he finally moved. Sometime later I was called down to the office, and there was the student in the office with the principal. The principal said that he had heard that he had refused to give me his name. I said that he had, but I was sure he was so embarrassed about it that we shouldn’t ask him to repeat it. It must be really hard to have a last name as business and first name as f------. The student was hanging his head, and the principal told me that because of what he said and his refusal to leave the lounge, he was going to be suspended and would not be allowed to play in the football game against Provo that night. He wanted to know if that punishment met with my approval. The poor kid, a senior, was going to miss the biggest game of the year, and he was on the first string and played both ways. Boy, did he look pitiful. I looked at him and at the principal and said that I did not agree, that he had enough problems in life going through with such a horrible name. I finally said that he should play and maybe help out in the lunchroom. Everyone seemed relieved about that decision.

This happened while I was a teacher in room D-2. Loved that room. The football coach had been standing outside the door and had heard everything that went on, and soon the whole football team and then student body knew, and he spent the rest of the year being called Mr. Business.

The next event happened while I was an assistant principal. The city and state police showed up to search all of the lockers with K-9 dogs to sniff for the presence of drugs. The school went on lock down, while they searched. The administrators were in the halls to make sure they were clear and all students were in class locked down. I came across a young man going to his locker, and told him to move quickly to his room or leave the school. He just looked at me and said, “Why don’t you kiss my ass and lick my balls.” I told him that it was quite an offer, but I wouldn’t be able to do that, besides I would most likely be fired. He looked at me and just left the building, exclaiming some words that I knew and some new ones. They looked all hour and found no drugs. They found one student’s backpack that the dog sniffed and wanted what was in it, but it was only a ham sandwich.

Two weeks later I received a call from the counseling office that they had a student that was to receive a full-ride scholarship to UVSC in their technology department, but he needed to be interviewed by the administrator in charge of the vocational programs, and that was me. I told the counselor to send him down. She then asked if I remembered a student who had said some profane things to me a couple of weeks earlier. I said that I did, then she said it is that student that needs to have your signature and interview for the award. I again said, “Send him down.”

When the student arrived at my office, he seemed to me to be a little pale, but he came in and sat down to be interviewed. He had the papers that needed to be signed with him. I asked him what he was going to do with the education and training he had been offered. He seemed to relax a little and told me what he wanted to learn and what jobs were available in the area. After awhile I asked for the papers that needed to be signed. He looked at me and said, “I know you know that I was the student in the hall during the lock down.” I told him that I did know, but the two things had nothing to do with each other. The scholarship was to help him better his life and should not be stopped for revenge. I don’t know if he understood what I was saying or not, but he was happy and left with a full-ride scholarship.